theknightshift | inbox (etraya)

[Jason has a fire going and he's sitting on the ground next to his makeshift firepit, cooking some hot dogs on the end of a prong. He listens for any sign of an approach until he recognizes the sound of footfalls.]

Figured you might be hungry.

[Jason's face is still a big bruise, but it's not nearly as severe. His posture, too is more relaxed and perhaps this time in the woods alone has helped him calm down.]

[ bruce honestly wasn’t entirely sure who would be waiting for him when he got the ping for Jason’s location. The appeal to get him out here didn’t seem hostile, but when it came to Jason, that didn’t seem to matter much. It made deciding how he would approach this situation a little more complicated than perhaps any other time.

Its a risk coming here unarmed, but he does (save for the batarang in his pocket. If his guess is correct he won’t need it. If it isn’t, he’ll only need the one). And he approaches Jason directly, not as Batman. But as Bruce Wayne. ]

Thanks. How long have you been out here?

[ he knows how long, but figures this would help break the ice. ]

About four days. [Jason flicks his gaze over to Bruce before returning to the hot dogs, which he's deemed are cooked. He busies himself with putting them in buns and then holding out one of the dogs to Bruce.

His Bruce would never eat a hot dog, much less one cooked over a fire like this. So Jason watches, silently testing how close this Bruce is to his.]

[ hot dogs aren’t his favorite but he’s not above eating them. Especially if it helps put Jason at ease. He takes the bun and sits down to bite into it with an appreciative hum. ]

Looks like the outdoors have been kind to you.

[Jason releases a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding when Bruce bites down. Okay, so maybe he's not so stuffy as his Bruce.]

Whole lot better than the city.

[Jason puts his hot dog in a bun and starts chewing. Not bad. He swallows down his bite before considering how best to approach the subject of the belfry.]

Look, I didn't have a good relationship with my Bruce. I was hurt and he didn't fucking bother to fly back from Spain or wherever to make sure I was okay. I started to have nightmares and he fired me.

[Which is to say,] I don't trust you and I don't trust the belfry. If you guys could back the fuck up, life would be a lot easier.

[ He can sense the tension ease from Jason at something as simple as biting into a hotdog. The relationship could be difficult; Bruce isn't a stranger to that. But it makes him wonder what happened to make the relationship fall apart so quickly.

The bits Jason's been willing to reveal helps piece the picture together, but there are still so many empty spots. ]

If you want your space, I won't object. My door is open if you ever need me for anything. But, I do object to disregarding your health.

[ He gestures to the bruises on Jason's face. ]

I don't care what started the fight. All I will ask from you is that you do not ignore serious injuries like that again.

[Jason watches Bruce but then rolls his eyes at what he sees as false concern for his health.]

Oh like you give a shit. Missing your jet here? Can't run away, can you.

[Nevermind that Jason went off on his own with a fucked up nose and a concussion.]

[ Bruce lowers his half finished hotdog and gives Jason a look. He isn't angry. Just slightly annoyed and a little frustrated. ]

You need to stop blaming me for what he's done, Jason.

[Jason clenches his teeth as he regards Bruce.]

What makes you any different?

I haven't abandoned you.

[ If anything he's been a little pushy ]

[Okay, this Bruce does have Jason there. Jason looks down at the ground as he thinks. His Bruce would not have come at his request and especially not out to the woods.]

Did you ever send me to the Titans? Ever tried to make Dick train me instead of you?

No.

[ To both questions. ]

You--Jason was my partner, therefore my responsibility. [ my soldier, my fault. ahem ]

[This is the first of being referred to as a partner. It's what Jason always wanted, but he'd been pawned off to the Titans and then when the Titans didn't want him, Bruce seemed to find every way possible to leave him alone with the impossible task of showing restraint.]

You never sent me off anywhere? [His voice is quieter, more vulnerable.]

If you ever leave, it's because you chose to.

[ He's not being 100% forthcoming about past actions, but those were just that: past actions. As far as he's concerned this is a true statement. ]

Huh.

[Jason considers what this Bruce has said and his mind returns to the worry that one day Bruce will wake up and realize he's made a terrible error bringing Jason into the flock.

It takes a couple deep breaths before he asks,] Did you ever call me a mistake?

No. You were never a mistake.

[ The thought has crossed his mind more than once, especially when the relationship was fragile or fraught or downright hostile. But ultimately? Bruce's life would be a little bit emptier without Jason Todd in it. He had to live a long time without him. He knows from first hand experience. ]

Our relationship isn't perfect, Jason, but I don't regret having you in my life.

[Jason stares over at Bruce with a mix of regret and wishfulness. Even before he said it out loud, his Bruce acted like he was a mistake. He sent Jason off to the Titans without a second thought, insisted that Dick should train him instead of Bruce himself. Coming home after the Titans had been difficult, but again he pawned Jason off before the words came out of his mouth, before he fired Jason outright.]

Did you ever fire me?

[Jason's voice is vulnerable, unsteady.]

[ At the time it felt like the right thing to do. Jason had become insubordinate, angry, hostile. Bruce didn’t fire him, but thought being Robin was too much for him. Long before Garzonas met his fate on the other side of that balcony.

He never fired Jason outright, but removed him? Absolutely. ]

No.

[Jason goes quiet again, watching Bruce with the utmost attention.]

You’d never bench me for nightmares?

What are you having nightmares about, Jason?

[ Bruce returns Jason’s gaze ]

Does it matter?

[Jason asks, frowning at Bruce.]

I would not have asked if it didn’t.

They’re about falling. [Jason withdraws more into himself.]

[ Secretly? Bruce is relieved. Jason's answer could have very easily changed the trajectory of this conversation. Falling, he could deal with. The Joker? Was not a fight he was looking forward to rehashing. ]

Why did you fall?

[Jason levels his gaze at Bruce.]

Why does it matter?

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